More connections. Less connected.

Australians are running out of friends. Or so it seems. Fewer people are saying they have lots of friends and they’re happier for it. According to the latest HILDA survey data, it’s a trend that predates lockdowns and never really corrected after them.

That doesn’t only mean fewer around the dinner table. The report finds that a low perceived number of friends correlates with fewer social activities, greater feelings of loneliness and poorer mental health. And the older you get, the harder it is to make friends according to the researchers. 

Is it a literal case of out with the old and in with the new? A YouGov study found that 1 in 6 Australians would sometimes rather stay home and talk to a chatbot than meet friends. Half of the Gen Z respondents reported confiding in AI, and 1 in 7 said they could fall in love with an AI chatbot. The researchers found chatbot use is not happening just alongside changes in social behaviour or loneliness, “but perhaps also playing a role in the acceleration of those trends." What’s lost? The ability to read social cues, small talk, engage in spontaneous conversations, and build interpersonal relationships.

You can make an argument that having para-social relationships means you have more energy to put into your in-person relationships. Kinda. Maybe. Perhaps the most alarming word in the YouGov research is the innocuous ‘rather’. Young Australians are preferring to stay home and curl up with AI ‘rather’ than spend time with friends.

ChatGPT is always there to chat. It always has an answer. And if it doesn’t have one you like, all you have to do is ask for one that you do. AI chatbots are trained to agree with you. So what does that mean for the joy and pains, obligations and rewards of IRL friends? The give and take. The frank feedback you need to hear. The morality checks.This story isn’t one of AI stealing our friends. It’s one of convergence.